showing your friend something you know they would flip out over and they say “I’ve already seen it”
i was supposed to be the hero
””“”“why did you cut your hair?::”“”“” i cut my hair to piss you off. specifially you, i was thinking of you when i cut my hair. i was thinking that you, specifically, would be interested in what my newly short hair meant to you, specifically.
fifty favorite fictional characters
↳ 4. Dr. Perry Cox (Scrubs)
I suppose I could riff a list of things that I care as little about as our last week together. Lemme see, uh, low-carb diets. Michael Moore. The Republican National Convention. Kabbalah and all Kabbalah-related products. Hi-def TV, the Bush daughters, wireless hot spots, The O.C., the U.N., recycling, getting Punk’d, Danny Gans, the Latin Grammys, the real Grammys. Jeff, that Wiggle who sleeps too darn much, The Yankees payroll, all the red states, all the blue states, every hybrid car, every talk show host, everything on the planet, everything in the solar system, everything everything everything everything everything that exists — past, present and future, in all discovered and undiscovered dimensions. Oh, and Hugh Jackman.
WHY AM I LAUGHING SO HARD WHY IS MY SENSE OF HUMOR THIS TERRIBLE